This is a 520-page Adobe Acrobat e-Book brimming with clean, funny jokes appropriate for the pulpit and Christian public speaking. It is a great sermon aid, fully indexed with over 800 joke categories.
As a person who has been involved in ministry for over 30 years, I’ve learned that adding humor to sermons and teaching messages plays a huge role in keeping the attention cheap beats by dre of the congregation or audience. I'm sure you’ve discovered the same to be true.
This professionally-produced e-Book is one that I’ve personally put together, based on years of experience, and I know it will help you add appropriate humor to your sermons and messages. It is loaded with pulpit humor — that is, good clean jokes and clean humor!
I’ve seen collections of preacher jokes before — and I know that they often contain jokes that are not funny or are inappropriate. But this collection is brimming with genuinely funny Christian jokes and Christian humor.
This convenient collection of humor has over 800 topical categories of jokes and funny stories. Just click on a topic in the outer left margin of the page, and you’ll automatically be taken to the jokes relating to that topic. THIS IS THE SAME TOOL I USE WHEN PUTTING TOGETHER MY MESSAGES.
Below are a few snapshots:
These 800+ joke categories in the scrollable outer cheap beats by dre left margin make it easy to navigate the 520+ page ebook. By scanning through the topical categories, you can quickly find the best clean funny jokes, clean comedy, and humorous stories that relate to your message. In no time at all, you can find just the Christian joke you’re looking for.
FREE BONUS: If you order by May 31, 2010, I will also include at no extra charge a FileMaker Pro database of the same jokes (FileMaker Pro software is required). We will be selling the FileMaker Pro database separately in the near future, but if you order your e-Book now, the database is yours free.
Here's a snapshot:
Want a sampling of jokes? Take a look:
A Little Girl
The little girl excitedly reported at home what she had learned at Sunday school concerning the creation of Adam and Eve:
"The teacher told us how God made the first cheap beats by dre man and the first woman. He made the man first. But the man was very lonely with nobody to talk to him. So God put the man to sleep. And while the man was asleep, God took out his brains and made a woman of them."
The Russian leader Kruschef is reported to have once said, "I don't believe in God and He knows I don't believe in him."
Well-meaning Lady to a Pastor: “Pastor, your words this morning were like water to a drowning woman.”
A preacher announced from the pulpit, “I have good news and I have bad news. The good news is that we have enough money to retire the mortgage on the church.”
A sigh of relief went through the congregation.
The preacher continued: “The bad news is that the money is still in your
Money used to talk — then it whispered. Now it just sneaks off.
Most money is tainted. Taint yours and taint mine.
Money talks. It says good-bye.
It takes twice as much money to live beyond your means as it used to.
Student’s note to the professor at the cheap beats by dre top of the final exam: “Blessed are the merciful.”
Professor’s note to the student on the graded exam: “Ye shall know them by their fruits.”
A deacon described has pastor’s sermon one Sunday morning as being “Like the peace and mercy of God.”
“How do you mean?” he was asked.
“His sermon,” the deacon replied, “was like the peace of God in thatit passed all understanding; it was like God’s mercy in that I thought it would endure forever.”
A group of women were talking together. One woman said, "Our congregation is sometimes down to 30 or 40 on a Sunday."
Another said: "That's nothing, sometimes our congregation is down to six or seven."
A maiden lady in her seventies added her bit, "Why, it's so bad in our church on Sundays that when the minister says 'dearly beloved', it makes me blush."
The following quotations were taken from a Toronto newspaper. They are samples of comments that individuals wrote down on their claim forms following their auto accidents:
• Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.
• I collided with a stationary streetcar coming the opposite direction.
• I had been shopping for plants all day cheap beats by dre, and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision. I did not see the other car.
• My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
“My goodness, man,” exclaimed the physician. “You’re so anemic. Does your finger bleed when you cut it?”
“Nah,” said the patient. “It just hisses and puckers up a little.”
When I told my doctor about my loss of memory he made me pay in advance.
Nurse: “How are we today? Are we taking our pills? You know what happens if we don’t?”
Patient: “Yes, we will die and they will bury us.”
Okay, you get the picture.
I think this little tool will prove as cheap beats by dre useful to you as it has been to me.
Order today and it will be shipped on a CD-ROM.
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P.S. All proceeds from cheap beats by dre this e-Book go to the support of ministry.
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